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  “I hurried back to my hole, and, rage giving place to despair, sought for the potion that was to procure abortion, and swallowed it, with a wish that it might destroy me, at the same time that it stopped the sensations of newborn life, which I felt with indescribable emotion. My head turned ’round, my heart grew sick, and in the horrors of approaching dissolution, mental anguish was swallowed up. The effect of the medicine was violent, and I was confined to my bed several days; but, youth and a strong constitution prevailing, I once more crawled out, to ask myself the cruel question, ‘Whither I should go?’ I had but two shillings left in my pocket, the rest had been expended, by a poor woman who slept in the same room, to pay for my lodging, and purchase the necessaries of which she partook.

  “With this wretch I went into the neighboring streets to beg, and my disconsolate appearance drew a few pence from the idle, enabling me still to command a bed; till, recovering from my illness, and taught to put on my rags to the best advantage, I was accosted from different motives, and yielded to the desire of the brutes I met, with the same detestation that I had felt for my still more brutal master.”

  CORA, UNASHAMED

  Langston Hughes

  I.

  Melton was one of those miserable in-between little places, not large enough to be a town, nor small enough to be a village—that is, a village in the rural, charming sense of the world. Melton had no charm about it. It was merely a nondescript collection of houses and buildings in a region of farms—one of those sad American places with sidewalks, but no paved streets; electric lights, but no sewage; a station, but no trains that stopped, save a jerky local, morning and evening. And it was 150 miles from any city at all—even Sioux City.

  Cora Jenkins was one of the least of the citizens of Melton. She was what the people referred to when they wanted to be polite, as a Negress, and when they wanted to be rude, as a nigger—sometimes adding the word “wench” for no good reason, for Cora was usually an inoffensive soul, except that she sometimes cussed.

  She had been in Melton for forty years. Born there. Would die there probably. She worked for the Studevants, who treated her like a dog. She stood it. Had to stand it; or work for poorer white folks who would treat her worse; or go jobless. Cora was like a tree—once rooted, she stood, in spite of storms and strife, wind, and rocks, in the earth.

  She was the Studevants’ maid of all work—washing, ironing, cooking, scrubbing, taking care of kids, nursing old folks, making fires, carrying water.

  Cora, bake three cakes for Mary’s birthday tomorrow night. You, Cora, give Rover a bath in that tar soap I bought. Cora, take Ma some Jell-O, and don’t let her have even a taste of that raisin pie. She’ll keep us up all night if you do. Cora, iron my stockings. Cora, come here… Cora, put… Cora… Cora… Cora! Cora!

  And Cora would answer, “Yes, m’am.”

  The Studevants thought they owned her, and they were probably right: they did. There was something about the teeth in the trap of economic circumstance that kept her in their power practically all her life—in the Studevant kitchen, cooking; in the Studevant parlor, sweeping; in the Studevant backyard, hanging clothes.

  You want to know how that could be? How a trap could close so tightly? Here is the outline:

  Cora was the oldest of a family of eight children—the Jenkins niggers. The only Negroes in Melton, thank God! Where they came from originally—that is, the old folks—God knows. The kids were born there. The old folks are still there now: Pa drives a junk wagon. The old woman ails around the house, ails and quarrels. Seven kids are gone. Only Cora remains. Cora simply couldn’t go, with nobody else to help take care of Ma. And before that she couldn’t go, with nobody to see her brothers and sisters through school (she the oldest, and Ma ailing). And before that—well, somebody had to help Ma look after one baby behind another that kept on coming.

  As a child Cora had no playtime. She always had a little brother, or a little sister in her arms. Bad, crying, bratty babies, hungry and mean. In the eighth grade she quit school and went to work with the Studevants.

  After that, she ate better. Half day’s work at first, helping Ma at home the rest of the time. Then full days, bringing home her pay to feed her father’s children. The old man was rather a drunkard. What little money he made from closet-cleaning, ash-hauling, and junk-dealing he spent mostly on the stuff that makes you forget you have eight kids.

  He passed the evenings telling long, comical lies to the white riff-raff of the town, and drinking licker. When his horse died, Cora’s money went for a new one to haul her Pa and his rickety wagon around. When the mortgage money came due, Cora’s wages kept the man from taking the roof from over their heads. When Pa got in jail, Cora borrowed ten dollars from Mrs. Studevant and got him out.

  Cora stinted, and Cora saved, and wore the Studevants’ old clothes, and ate the Studevants’ leftover food, and brought her pay home. Brothers and sisters grew up. The boys, lonesome, went away, as far as they could from Melton. One by one, the girls left too, mostly in disgrace. “Ruinin’ ma name,” Pa Jenkins said, “Ruinin’ ma good name! They can’t go out berryin’ but what they come back in disgrace.” There was something about the cream-and-tan Jenkins girls that attracted the white farm hands.

  Even Cora the humble, had a lover once. He came to town on a freight train (long ago now), and worked at the livery-stable. (That was before autos got to be so common.) Everybody said he was an IWW.1 Cora didn’t care. He was the first man and the last she ever remembered wanting. She had never known a colored lover. There weren’t any around. That was not her fault.

  This white boy, Joe, he always smelt like the horses. He was some kind of foreigner. Had an accent, and yellow hair, big hands, and grey eyes.

  It was summer. A few blocks beyond the Studevants’ house, meadows and orchards and sweet fields stretched away to the far horizon. At night, stars in the velvet sky. Moon sometimes. Crickets and katydids and lightning bugs. The scent of grass. Cora waiting. That boy, Joe, a cigarette spark far off, whistling in the dark. Love didn’t take long—Cora with the scent of the Studevants’ supper about her, and a cheap perfume. Joe, big and strong and careless as the horses he took care of, smelling like the stable.

  Ma would quarrel because Cora came home late, or because none of the kids had written for three or four weeks, or because Pa was drunk again. Thus, the summer passed, a dream of big hands and grey eyes.

  Cora didn’t go anywhere to have her child. Nor tried to hide it. When the baby grew big within her, she didn’t feel that it was a disgrace. The Studevants told her to go home and stay there. Joe left town. Pa cussed. Ma cried. One April morning the kid was born. She had grey eyes, and Cora called her Josephine, after Joe.

  Cora was humble and shameless before the fact of the child. There were no Negroes in Melton to gossip, and she didn’t care what the white people said. They were in another world. Of course, she hadn’t expected to marry Joe, or keep him. He was of that other world, too. But the child was hers—a living bridge between two worlds. Let people talk.

  Cora went back to work at the Studevants’—coming home at night to nurse her kid, and quarrel with Ma. About that time, Mrs. Art Studevant had a child, too, and Cora nursed it. The Studevants’ little girl was named Jessie. As the two children began to walk and talk, Cora sometimes brought Josephine to play with Jessie—until the Studevants objected, saying she could get her work done better if she left her child at home.

  “Yes, m’am,” said Cora.

  But in a little while they didn’t need to tell Cora to leave her child at home, for Josephine died of whooping-cough. One rosy afternoon, Cora saw the little body go down into the ground in a white casket that cost four weeks’ wages.

  Since Ma was ailing, Pa, smelling of licker, stood with her at the grave. The two of them alone. Cora was not humble before the fact of death. As she turned away from the hole, tears came—but at the same time a stream of curses so violent that they made the grave-tenders look up i
n startled horror.

  She cussed out God for taking away the life that she herself had given. She screamed, “My baby! God damn it! My baby! I bear her and you take her away!” She looked at the sky where the sun was setting and yelled in defiance. Pa was amazed and scared. He pulled her up on his rickety wagon and drove off, clattering down the road between green fields and sweet meadows that stretched away to the far horizon. All through the ugly town Cora wept and cursed, using all the bad words she had learned from Pa in his drunkenness.

  The next week she went back to the Studevants. She was gentle and humble in the face of death—she loved their baby. In the afternoons on the back porch, she would pick little Jessie up and rock her to sleep, burying her dark face in the milky smell of the white child’s hair.

  II.

  The years passed. Pa and Ma Jenkins only dried up a little. Old Man Studevant died. The old lady had two strokes. Mrs. Art Studevant and her husband began to look their age, greying hair and sagging stomachs. The children were grown, or nearly so. Kenneth took over the management of the hardware store that Grandpa had left. Jack went off to college. Mary was a teacher. Only Jessie remained a child—her last year in high school. Jessie, nineteen now, and rather slow in her studies, graduating at last. In the fall she would go to Normal.

  Cora hated to think about her going away. In her heart she had adopted Jessie. In that big and careless household, it was always Cora who stood like a calm and sheltering tree for Jessie to run to in her troubles. As a child, when Mrs. Art spanked her, as soon as she could, the tears still streaming, Jessie would find her way to the kitchen and Cora. At each school term’s end, when Jessie had usually failed in some of her subjects (she quite often failed, being a dull child), it was Cora who saw the report card first with the bad marks on it. Then Cora would devise some way of breaking the news gently to the old folks.

  Her mother was always a little ashamed of stupid Jessie, for Mrs. Art was the civic and social leader of Melton, president of the Woman’s Club three years straight, and one of the pillars of her church. Mary, the elder, the teacher, would follow with dignity in her footsteps, but Jessie! That child! Spankings in her youth, and scoldings now, did nothing to Jessie’s inner being. She remained a plump, dull, freckled girl, placid and strange. Everybody found fault with her but Cora.

  In the kitchen Jessie bloomed. She laughed. She talked. She was sometimes even witty. And she learned to cook wonderfully. With Cora, everything seemed so simple—not hard and involved like algebra, or Latin grammar, or the civic problems of Mama’s club, or the sermons at church. Nowhere in Melton, nor with anyone, did Jessie feel so comfortable as with Cora in the kitchen. She knew her mother looked down on her as a stupid girl. And with her father there was no bond. He was always too busy buying and selling to bother with the kids. And often he was off in the city. Old, doddering Grandma made Jessie sleepy and sick. Cousin Nora (mother’s cousin) was as stiff and prim as a minister’s daughter. And Jessie’s older brothers and sisters went their ways, seeing Jessie hardly at all, except at the big table at mealtimes.

  Like all the unpleasant things in the house, Jessie was left to Cora. And Cora was happy. To have a child to raise, a child the same age as her Josephine would have been, gave her a purpose in life, a warmth inside herself. It was Cora who nursed and mothered and petted and loved the dull little Jessie through the years. And now Jessie was a young woman, graduating (late) from high school.

  But something had happened to Jessie. Cora knew it before Mrs. Art did. Jessie was not too stupid to have a boyfriend. She told Cora about it like a mother. She was afraid to tell Mrs. Art.

  Afraid! Afraid! Afraid!

  Cora said, “I’ll tell her.” So, humble and unashamed about life, one afternoon she marched into Mrs. Art’s sun porch and announced quite simply, “Jessie’s going to have a baby.”

  Cora smiled, but Mrs. Art stiffened like a bolt. Her mouth went dry. She rose like a soldier. Sat down. Rose again. Walked straight toward the door, turned around, and whispered, “What?”

  “Yes, m’am, a baby. She told me. A little child. Its father is Willie Matsoulos, whose folks runs the ice-cream stand on Main. She told me. They want to get married, but Willie ain’t here now. He don’t know yet about the child.”

  Cora would have gone on humbly and shamelessly talking about the little unborn had not Mrs. Art fallen into uncontrollable hysterics. Cousin Nora came running from the library, her glasses on a chain. Old Lady Studevant’s wheelchair rolled up, doddering and shaking with excitement. Jessie came, when called, red and sweating, but had to go out, for when her mother looked up from the couch and saw her she yelled louder than ever. There was a rush for camphor bottles and water and ice. Crying and praying followed all over the house. Scandalization! Oh, my Lord! Jessie was in trouble.

  “She ain’t in trouble neither,” Cora insisted. “No trouble having a baby you want. I had one.”

  “Shut up, Cora!”

  “Yes, m’am… But I had one.”

  “Hush, I tell you.”

  “Yes, m’am.”

  III.

  Then it was that Cora began to be shut out. Jessie was confined to her room. That afternoon, when Miss Mary came home from school, the four white women got together behind closed doors in Mrs. Art’s bedroom. For once Cora cooked supper in the kitchen without being bothered by an interfering voice. Mr. Studevant was away in Des Moines. Somehow Cora wished he was home. Big and gruff as he was, he had more sense than the women. He’d probably make a shot-gun wedding out of it. But left to Mrs. Art, Jessie would never marry the Greek boy at all. This Cora knew. No man had been found yet good enough for sister Mary to mate with. Mrs. Art had ambitions which didn’t include the likes of Greek icecream makers’ sons.

  Jessie was crying when Cora brought her supper up. The Black woman sat down on the bed and lifted the white girl’s head in her dark hands. “Don’t you mind, honey,” Cora said. “Just sit tight, and when the boy comes back I’ll tell him how things are. If he loves you he’ll marry you. And there ain’t no reason why you can’t marry, neither—you both white. Even if he is a foreigner, he’s a right nice boy.”

  “He loves me,” Jessie said. “I know he does. He said so.”

  But before the boy came back (or Mr. Studevant either) Mrs. Art and Jessie went to Kansas City. “For an Easter shopping trip,” the weekly paper said.

  Then spring came in full bloom, and the fields and orchards at the edge of Melton stretched green and beautiful to the far horizon. Cora remembered her own spring, twenty years ago, and a great sympathy and pain welled up in her heart for Jessie, who was the same age that Josephine would have been, had she lived. Sitting on the kitchen porch shelling peas, Cora thought back over her own life—years and years of working for the Studevants; years and years of going home to nobody but Ma and Pa; little Josephine dead; only Jessie to keep her heart warm. And she knew that Jessie was the dearest thing she had in the world. All the time the girl was gone now, she worried.

  After ten days, Mrs. Art and her daughter came back. But Jessie was thinner and paler than she’d ever been in her life. There was no light in her eyes at all. Mrs. Art looked a little scared as they got off the train.

  “She had an awful attack of indigestion in Kansas City,” she told the neighbors and club women. “That’s why I stayed away so long, waiting for her to be able to travel. Poor Jessie! She looks healthy, but she’s never been a strong child. She’s one of the worries of my life.” Mrs. Art talked a lot, explained a lot, about how Jessie had eaten the wrong things in Kansas City.

  At home, Jessie went to bed. She wouldn’t eat. When Cora brought her food up, she whispered, “The baby’s gone.”

  Cora’s face went dark. She bit her lips to keep from cursing. She put her arms about Jessie’s neck. The girl cried. Her food went untouched.

  A week passed. They tried to make Jessie eat then. But the food wouldn’t stay on her stomach. Her eyes grew yellow, her tongue white, her heart a
cted crazy. They called in old Doctor Brown, but within a month (as quick as that) Jessie died.

  She never saw the Greek boy any more. Indeed, his father lost his license, “due to several

  complaints by the mothers of children, backed by the Woman’s Club,” that he was selling tainted ice-cream. Mrs. Art Studevant had started a campaign to rid the town of objectionable tradespeople and questionable characters. Greeks were bound to be one or the other. For a while they even closed up Pa Jenkins’ favorite bootlegger. Mrs. Studevant thought this would please Cora, but Cora only said, “Pa’s been drinkin’ so long he just as well keep on.” She refused further to remark on her employer’s campaign of purity. In the midst of this clean-up Jessie died.

  On the day of the funeral, the house was stacked with flowers. (They held the funeral, not at the church, but at home, on account of old Grandma Studevant’s infirmities.) All the family dressed in deep mourning. Mrs. Art was prostrate. As the house for the services approached, she revived, however, and ate an omelet, “to help me go through the afternoon.”

  “And Cora,” she said, “cook me a little piece of ham with it. I feel so weak.”

  “Yes, m’am.”

  The senior class from the high school came in a body. The Woman’s Club came with their badges. The Reverend Doctor McElroy had on his highest collar and longest coat. The choir sat behind the coffin, with a special soloist to sing “He Feedeth His Flocks Like a Shepherd.” It was a beautiful spring afternoon, and a beautiful funeral.

  Except that Cora was there. Of course, her presence created no comment (she was the family servant), but it was what she did, and how she did it, that has remained the talk of Melton to this day—for Cora was not humble in the face of death.

  When the Reverend Doctor McElroy had finished his eulogy, and the senior class had read their memorials, and the songs had been sung, and they were about to allow the relatives and friends to pass around for one last look at Jessie Studevant, Cora got up from her seat by the dining-room door. She said, “Honey, I want to say something.” She spoke as if she were addressing Jessie. She approached the coffin and held out her brown hands over the girl’s body. Her face moved in agitation. People sat stone-still and there was a long pause. Suddenly she screamed. “They killed you! And for nothin’… They killed your child… They took you away from here in the springtime of your life, and now you’se gone, gone, gone!”